Love is All You Need ! But for a Buy or a Lease ?!

One of my New York friend, Sébastien, yesterday sent me the below postings on Craiglist (free classified ads). I found it quite amazing and hilarious.

Coincidentally, another New York friend, Fabrice, felt he was kind of obliged to hint on his blog he might not be the man who was involved in this very romantic exchange !

American men usually think latin women are more romantic than their american counterparts, there could sometimes be some truth there. I sense the woman here got what she deserved and no wonder there are so many divorces now in the US (above 50% divroce rate, nationwide, much more in large cities such as NYC).

On this other side of the Atlantic, love seems to be often spoiled by money and other materialistic aspects.

Anyway, down to the case, here are the postings :

What am I doing wrong?

Okay, I'm tired of beating around the bush. I'm a beautiful
(spectacularly beautiful) 25 year old girl. I'm articulate and classy.

I'm not from New York. I'm looking to get married to a guy who makes
at least half a million a year. I know how that sounds, but keep in
mind that a million a year is middle class in New York City, so I
don't think I'm overreaching at all.

Are there any guys who make 500K or more on this board? Any wives?
Could you send me some tips? I dated a business man who makes average
around 200 - 250. But that's where I seem to hit a roadblock. 250,000
won't get me to central park west. I know a woman in my yoga class who
was married to an investment banker and lives in Tribeca, and she's
not as pretty as I am, nor is she a great genius. So what is she doing
right? How do I get to her level?

Here are my questions specifically:

- Where do you single rich men hang out? Give me specifics- bars,
restaurants, gyms

-What are you looking for in a mate? Be honest guys, you won't hurt my feelings

-Is there an age range I should be targeting (I'm 25)?

- Why are some of the women living lavish lifestyles on the Upper East
Side so plain? I've seen really 'plain Jane' boring types who have
nothing to offer married to incredibly wealthy guys. I've seen drop
dead gorgeous girls in singles bars in the east village. What's the
story there?

- Jobs I should look out for? Everyone knows - lawyer, investment
banker, doctor. How much do those guys really make? And where do they
hang out? Where do the hedge fund guys hang out?

- How you decide marriage vs. just a girlfriend? I am looking for MARRIAGE ONLY

Please hold your insults - I'm putting myself out there in an honest
way. Most beautiful women are superficial; at least I'm being up front
about it. I wouldn't be searching for these kind of guys if I wasn't
able to match them - in looks, culture, sophistication, and keeping a
nice home and hearth.

it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

PostingID: 432279810

THE ANSWER

Dear Pers-431649184:

I read your posting with great interest and have thought meaningfully
about your dilemma. I offer the following analysis of your
predicament.

Firstly, I'm not wasting your time, I qualify as a guy who fits your
bill; that is I make more than $500K per year. That said here's how I
see it.

Your offer, from the prospective of a guy like me, is plain and simple
a crappy business deal. Here's why. Cutting through all the B.S., what
you suggest is a simple trade: you bring your looks to the party and I
bring my money. Fine, simple. But here's the rub, your looks will fade
and my money will likely continue into perpetuity...in fact, it is
very likely that my income increases but it is an absolute certainty
that you won't be getting any more beautiful!

So, in economic terms you are a depreciating asset and I am an earning
asset. Not only are you a depreciating asset, your depreciation
accelerates! Let me explain, you're 25 now and will likely stay pretty
hot for the next 5 years, but less so each year. Then the fade begins
in earnest. By 35 stick a fork in you!

So in Wall Street terms, we would call you a trading position, not a
buy and hold...hence the rub...marriage. It doesn't make good business
sense to "buy you" (which is what you're asking) so I'd rather lease.
In case you think I'm being cruel, I would say the following. If my
money were to go away, so would you, so when your beauty fades I need
an out. It's as simple as that. So a deal that makes sense is dating,
not marriage.

Separately, I was taught early in my career about efficient markets.
So, I wonder why a girl as "articulate, classy and spectacularly
beautiful"

as you has been unable to find your sugar daddy. I find it hard to
believe that if you are as gorgeous as you say you are that the $500K
hasn't found you, if not only for a tryout.

By the way, you could always find a way to make your own money and
then we wouldn't need to have this difficult conversation.

With all that said, I must say you're going about it the right way.

Classic "pump and dump."

I hope this is helpful, and if you want to enter into some sort of
lease, let me know

Comments

[Le Tribulateur]

C'est énorme!

[Jean]

Superbe en effet!
Ceci dit, c'est pas évident que la miss en question aie tout compris.

[Romain]

Génial :) Romantique ces américains.

[Guillaume Vialle]

Merci Michel pour ce pur moment de bonheur...
Absolumment hilarant (voire pathétique) la facon dont cette fille vend sa beaute en lui attribuant une valeur sur le marché et encore plus hilarante est la reponse du gars qui emploie les termes d'actifs, de depreciation, de location et de position; ceci dit il aurait aussi pu parler de couverture (!!!)

Ce message devrait etre le 101 du cours a l'intention des Francais qui ne comprennent rien aux Americains.

[Monica]

Cher Michele and Fabrice. I'm glad this posting could provide some emotional stimulation on your blog. It certainly has for me.

To this $500K gentleman, here is what I have to say:

I am a female living in New York who could describe herself as this other girl has. I choose not to. The more important point is that have you, Mr.500K+, ever thought that your offer to lease is in fact not your default option but your only real option ? Look at it this way. If looks were my number one criteria, I’d keep the car running too. A cute smile, gorgeous eyes and hot bod are only interesting to me until the next sexy thing comes along too. So if all you’re into is paying first and last months rent, keep doing as you are. But every smart finance person knows you’re losing money.

[frelkins]

Alas la madmoiselle above is not more artful. If she had better manners, a more restrained "upper class" look and demeanor, as well as killer social connections, she'd be set.

Marriages in NYC are actually made on this basis all the time -- but it appears the lady in question lacks the social graces to do the deal. Young up-n-coming guys in NYC need the "right kind" of wife to truly acquire the social power that translates in the Master-of-the-Universe earning power.

But sadly this lady has only proven that she couldn't be trusted on her own at an Upper East Side charity luncheon. She will never get her wish. . .

[Michel de Guilhermier]

Freikins, indeed, that was no classy post from the mademoiselle !

[Bast]

Hilarious post! thanks :)
But I think the best solution for this Mr 500K€ is really to buy the Miss and use it before its value decreases (5 years he says). Then he could rent it for a good price to a Mr 200K€ that will be happy with the 30 years old asset.
It seems like a good deal to me...

[Jimmy]

that's nuts

[Aurelius Tjin]

Whoa! She seems like a handful to me. I never thought you are allowed posts like that at Craglist? lol

[Jaya Kumar Patchala]

Nice post to think about. Even if someone moderates or edits postings, a few things escape from their notice. Such postings provide relief from regular stuff ;-). I think both of them aren't serious. Just trying to find out how it works, if at all it works!

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